I’m not sure I can do this, I think with increasing certainty as I hover in the blustery blackness, silently suspended between moments. It’s as if I’m frozen, but the rest of the world keeps moving around me. I wonder where I am. I know my home is just over there. Just over there being less than fifty metres away, but it may as well be as far as the moon. Here between one second and the next, I don’t know where the footpath ends, and the road begins. I listen for the space, which means the park is on my left, and just ahead. I listen for the wind rustling the autumn leaves. I listen for the car tires slowing down as they slide through the roundabout in the middle distance. I listen for the unmistakable thud of the units beside me. I listen for the gap between buildings. I listen for the sharpness where I know a spindly tree […]
Continue readingVision Into Shadow
“With all due respect honey, you really should slow down,” my husband says after we nearly collide with a well-dressed gentleman in a black suit cutting across our path. I’m pushing our eighteen month old in her new trike across the concourse of our local train station. It’s a place I am very familiar with. Although recently, what little vision I have seems to be gently but painfully fading from existence. My life feels like it is slipping into shadow. I love the trike with its extendible handle and small stature. It’s so much easier for me to use than the pram as it allows me to more obviously hold my cane. I worry that sometimes the comparative largeness of the pram frame might leave the cane almost invisible, making me feel vulnerable. Not that I’m willing to admit this aloud, because what if my husband thinks I’m not coping? Will he continue to let me push those boundaries of blind […]
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