Social equity is more than a theory. Exclusion comes in many forms: an interactive shopping centre map, a multi service lift access point, a self service appointment check-in desk. What do they all have in common you ask? Well, apart from usually being flat and indistinguishable touch screen devices of course, most of the time they do not have a text to speech provision built in, let alone activated for people who are blind or have low vision to utilise. Therefore, they decrease our sense of social equity just a little more with each encounter. However, it isn’t just the prevalence of technology as a wayfinding tool that invalidates my very presence in society as I attempt to navigate the built environment. In this case, it is the lack of a simple zebra crossing at a very busy intersection on the way to our local park. A park that has recently been upgraded, complete with full fencing, well thought out skill […]
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Blue Sky
The sky shimmers with a life-affirming blue that penetrates my soul to the core. I cannot stop looking at it with a mix of disbelief and awe. Who put that there, I ask the expanse, fully expecting it to answer. However, it says nothing. It simply watches me. An entity of endless patience and relentless stillness, neither moved nor unmoved by my discovery of its presence. I wonder how long it’s been standing there. Hello, I want to shout at it. Hello up there, can you see me? Here I am, and there you are, isn’t this amazing? I want to jump up and touch it to make sure it’s real, but my jumping and reaching doesn’t seem to get me any closer to its big, blue belly. I climb up on the outdoor table in a bid to hold it in my hands, but the blue eludes me. How is it that I can see it but cannot drag it […]
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Waiting For The Light
My husband tells me it’s light outside as he hands me a cup of tea. Gingerly, I begin to pull the debris of my being together in preparation for a post-surgical ophthalmology appointment, but it isn’t easy. Parts of my psyche are strewn like discarded clothes from a lovers tryst all over the artificially darkened bedroom, and I’m struggling to collect them. My husband administers another round of post-operative eye drops. He carefully helps me into the shower and gently washes my hair, because I literally can’t figure out what steps are involved. How do I do this? I don’t even understand the question, if it is indeed a question. Maybe it’s more of a concept. Whatever it is, I cannot comprehend the unidentifiable, unnameable fragments of those somethings floating across the astronomy of my mind. It’s as if I’ve forgotten how to do anything, or worse, never known in the first place. Forgetting would simply mean there’s a polar opposite […]
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Eye Had A Dream
It’s been more than six months since I first presented the idea of finding a new eye specialist to my husband, and if anyone said we’d be where we are right now, I would not have believed them. I would have wanted to, secretly hoping against hope they were right, but I wouldn’t have possessed the faith or fortitude to buy into the possibility. At least that’s what I tell myself, even though my actions, attitude, and secret ultimatums suggest otherwise. The truth is, I’m heavily invested in the outcome, and have no idea how I’m going to cope if the gamble doesn’t go my way. The only saving grace is how cautiously optimistic my surgeons are, and the fact that if it does go wrong, then at least my world will be unquestionable. As it is, we’ve kept my pending procedure very low key. Balancing my thoughts, feelings, expectations, and questions has been difficult enough, let alone adding the well-meaning […]
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Out Of Sight, Out Of My Mind
Honey, I am just not coping, I say to my husband one afternoon as I sit curled in the corner of the lounge. Astutely he says nothing, knowing I already have a solution in mind. Let’s go to the doctor and ask him for a referral to a new ophthalmologist, I push, trying to keep my tone neutral. The words are like cotton in my mouth, making me unsure if I should continue, because what if they turn out to be a noose? Losing what little sight I have, or think I have, is driving me out of my mind. It had been several years since my last proper check-up, but I didn’t want to go back to my previous eye specialist for fear of what he might say. Sure, he was lovely enough, extremely professional, knowledgeable, and highly regarded in his field. However I always thought we hadn’t quite found our footing, and he wondered why I insisted on taking […]
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